The Interview

Standing outside Westend Tower, looking up at the 96th floor gave me a terrible case of vertigo.  I can’t go up there.  It’s not the height, it’s the pressure.  This interview means everything.

“Relax, you don’t want to end up like me.” A voice said from behind a pillar.

A short vagrant wearing pink shoes and brown socks.

“Hmm, and who are you?” I asked.

“Just an old man who lost his way.” he added.

“Okay… well… thanks for the tip.” I began to walk into the building.

“Drugs fry the brain you know, like coffee dancing on a river of flame!” The man began screaming, startling nearby office workers.  “Ones eye is the meridian, forth only to those who appease him!” more random nonsense the man kept spurting out.

I walked over to the security desk to let them know about the crazy guy out front.  Security grabbed me and immediately tossed me to the side.

“What the fuck? I’m just letting you know about the cr…” he cut me off “I won’t tell you again, leave the premises now or we’ll bring in the heavies.”  Bringing in the cops? I’m just trying to go to a job interview, what is this guys deal?

He sits me down on a bench, overlooking the bustling foyer.  “Guess I’ll just wait here until my interview starts and make a break for it.” I thought.

When security wasn’t looking, I ran for the stairs.  I got to the 13th floor, grabbed an elevator, and smashed 96 several times.  The elevator seemed to take days, sweat was pouring off my face.  “Terrible first impression, here I come.”

The doors opened, and everyone avoided me like the plague.  The administrator grabbed the phone and started madly dialling numbers.  I didn’t understand what was happening.

I calmly walked up to her desk, put my briefcase on top, and tried to open it.  I wanted to get my documents out to at least show her who I am, and why I am here.  Damn thing wouldn’t open!

I felt something itchy on my leg, an irritated rubbing – I looked down and saw my pink shoes and brown socks.

“So, you guys hiring?”

via Daily Prompt: Fry


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